To intrude…or not….

On my walk today, I saw a neatly dressed woman ahead – with a store purchase tag dangling from the back. I should tell her, I thought. Then, I paused. Should I? Would she think I had nothing better to do than look at her? I recollected how I had worn tags on my clothes inadvertently and been teased for putting a price on myself. Without bothering to think further, I ran behind and told her.

This illustrated a quandary I frequently face. To announce the fact that I had observed something. Or not. Would they think it odd that I noticed? Would it be considered helpful or an intrusion of privacy?

Years ago, at our home in Pennsylvania, my next door neighbour had not laid out her garbage on trash pickup day. Being much younger then, I didn’t think. I immediately called and told her. I wondered whether it was actually helpful and neighbourly? Would it be seen as odd and nosy in a country where I was not of majority ethnicity and wore that difference on my sleeve every single minute?

While I have no definitive answer yet, I find that my conscience bothers me when I do not follow my instincts – so I go with what I feel at that moment. I am unable to pretend. Over time, I have learned to stay silent more though. However, I do keep ruminating on my every decision constantly, and well after I make it – a mental decision tree, so to speak, imagining how things might have transpired if I had done things differently. There is no end to this process, of course, but perhaps it would help me make better decisions next time?

To intrude to not to intrude? That continues to be the question……